Sunday, February 04, 2007

Public Service Announcement

Public Service Announcement
For all wives and potential wives

On proper behavior during the Super Bowl

During tonight's football game please refrain from idle chatter.

Do not discuss issues like painting the room, changing the draperies, who is doing the idiotic half-time show, how long the game will last, or where the kids will go to school, etc.

Please limit your comments to more intelligent and appropriate statements like "Hit him!", "Knock it down!", "Throw the ball!", "Block him" or "Block it" (depending on whether your husband’s team is running the ball or the opposing team is kicking it).

Wives (and especially potential wives) may also ask relevant questions like "Would you like more chips?", "Shall I get you a drink?" etc. But it is preferable for them to ask those questions while there is a lull in the action – while the teams are in the huddle, or better still, during commercials.

Lastly, do not, under any circumstances start cheering for the opposing team - that is considered Treason, and generally will not be tolerated.

These rules are made available for the benefit of wives who wish to keep their husbands and most especially for girls who are seeking to get a husband. Men are often enticed by women who act in a certain way, under the mistaken assumption that such behavior will continue after the marriage ceremony.

Hilarious satire.
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